Category: Personal Development

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Why you should be writing regularly for yourself

Have you ever wondered if you should write more? As I was reading The Power of Writing it Down by Allison Fallon, she discusses how incredibly beneficial writing can be and that everyone should be writing regularly. She discusses how writing for yourself, especially expressive writing, can improve your life.

Photo by lilartsy | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

These are the key ideas that stood out to me from this book:

  1. Writing provides so many benefits
  2. Doesn’t need to be published
  3. Makes the unconscious conscious

Keep reading for more details on each one.

Writing provides so many benefits

The key message of this book is really to highlight how beneficial writing can be for you and why everyone should spend some time writing. Even if you just spend 20 min a day, four times a week, you’ll start to see benefits.

Writing has so many benefits. For instance, writing can:

  • improve your well being or mood
  • help improve self awareness and deal with difficult situations
  • help clarify your thoughts and feelings
  • help when making decisions, by helping you find clarity on what to do.

In the book, Allison discussed an example of how writing helped individuals when searching for a job. There was a large group of middle aged men who had recently been let go from a company after working there for 15+ years. While they were all job searching, half of them did expressive writing exercises while the other half did not do any writing. Those that did the exercises were ~30% more likely to be hired, despite both groups getting a similar number of interviews.

What they found was that the men’s attitude affected the interview results, and the expressive writing had a significant impact on the men’s attitude. The men without the expressive writing exercises were still harbouring resentment from being let go, especially since they were not given any warning and they had devoted so much of their time and effort to the company. These feelings often came out during the interviews. Whereas those men that had done the writing exercises were more likely to have already dealt with their emotions and unlikely to have a negative attitude during the interview.

Writing and therapy

Writing can even help you while you go through therapy (it does not replace therapy). When used in collaboration with a health care professional, expressive writing can help you make faster progress. For instance, expressive writing can help you reinforce the lessons or skills you’ve learned in therapy by writing about it regularly. Writing can also help you discover insights into yourself and what you’ve gone through that you can then bring to discuss with the health care professional.

You need to be careful when relying too heavily on expressive writing without having someone to discuss your problems with. One issue that can arise by doing expressive writing in isolation is that you might mistake your own thoughts or opinions for facts. An example might be that you think “I’m fat” or “I’m a horrible person”, which is unlikely to be a fact, but is just your perception of yourself. When you work through these kinds of thoughts with a professional, they are able to give you perspective and make sure you’re not confusing an opinion as a fact.

If you suffer from any kind of mental illness, it’s always best to seek professional help, just as you would for any physical illness or injury.

Doesn’t need to be published

This book is all about getting people to write more and to write frequently as a form of self reflection and expression. To support that goal the book also debunks the idea that only certain people can write. Writing is not an elite skill. Almost all of us write throughout the day anyways, whether by sending emails, posting on social media, or just communicating with others. We are all writers.

Writing doesn’t need to be done any certain way, nor is it done by any certain people. You don’t need to wear fancy old-fashioned clothes (most writers write in comfy, casual clothes — think pyjamas). You don’t need to have a degree from a fancy school to be a writer. You just need to write. If you write, you are a writer.

Along with people’s perception of what a writer is, everyone has their own idea of what a good writer is. There’s no one definition of a “good writer.” But even if you never become a best selling author, that doesn’t mean you can’t be a writer. External validation from others isn’t necessary to be a writer (all you need to do is write).

In line with that, you don’t need to write with the aim of being published one day. Writing doesn’t have to exist for other people, some of the best writing is done for yourself. Not to mention that sometimes the purpose of writing is to simply go on a journey of self discovery or understanding and to determine what you really need.

Allison has helped many people with their writing projects. Often times the book or project that others expect from you is not what you need to write, make sure you’re being true to yourself.

Sometimes the process of writing can help you understand what you really need, and it may not be the current career path you’re pursuing. She’s had clients who started writing projects only for them to realize that they actually need to be doing something else. Even though they never finished writing the book or project, they are thankful for the experience because writing gave them clarity on what they really needed.

Writing for the sake of writing can lead you places you might not expect.

Everyone should be writing, even if writing is only ever for yourself.

Makes the unconscious conscious

I find this ties in closely with the two points above, as it’s both a benefit and the type of writing you may not want to publish. Expressive writing can help you make the unconscious conscious, by helping to bring your feelings and thoughts to the surface.

Writing can help you make sense of feelings and situations. The act of writing makes you slow down (especially writing by hand and not typing) and makes you take time to process your thoughts. Writing gives you a chance to sort through everything that is happening — similar to talking to someone about it.

Writing lets you take everything that’s been internalized (feelings, emotions, thoughts) and put them externally, so you can start to view them in a different way. Putting it all down on paper can help provide clarity, as you can also gain perspective on the situation or find ways to put your feelings into words.

Writing can be especially helpful with emotionally-charged situations or for working through fights that you continually have with your partner, especially when you feel like you are unable to communicate what you need or want. By spending time reflecting and writing about these situations, you may find the words you need to later communicate more effectively about what’s bothering you and what you need or want from the other person.

Final thoughts

I really enjoyed this book. I’ll be honest I wasn’t sure what the book was about before I started it, as I borrowed it from my library without reading the description. But I’m so happy that I read this book.

I have always been a journaler, even if inconsistent and infrequent. But there’s always been a part of me that’s understood how useful writing can be to process my own emotions. Personally, I struggle to process things when talking to people, but rather I find it so much easier to process my thoughts and feelings by writing it down. Writing also helps me find the words to clarify how I’m feeling and to communicate what I need.

I feel like this book just reinforced so many things I already believed. Now I want to be much more diligent in writing almost everyday. I used to just journal when I was faced with large decisions, going through stressful situations, or when I was unsure of why I was feeling sad/upset/frustrated/stressed/etc. But now I know how important and beneficial it is to journal regularly that I want to do be more intentional about writing regularly. Plus I love filling up journals, it’s just so satisfying and I love having an excuse to buy more journals.

I think one of the best parts of this book was focusing on how writing is beneficial for yourself. Publishing a book does not need to be your goal, you don’t even need to make your writing public. Rather writing is best used to help you process your own thoughts, feelings, and emotions. You should be writing simply for yourself, if others end up benefiting from it too that’s a bonus.

If you found this post interesting, or felt like you wanted to learn more, I would highly recommend this book. There are some great writing exercises throughout the book that you can use to connect with yourself. The book talks about the benefits of writing, with lots of clear evidence to back it up, along with giving you tools and activities to practice expressive writing.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts below!

References

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Did you know timing can be a science?

Have you ever wondered how important the timing of events is? As I was reading When by Daniel Pink, he discusses the science behind the timing of experiences and events. He discusses that when things occur can be as important as what is happening, and helps you to understand when you should be scheduling your time so that you get the best outcomes.

Photo by Nathan Dumlao | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

These were the key points that stood out to me:

  1. The power of endings
  2. When can be just as important as what
  3. Breaks are important

Keep reading for more details on each.

The power of endings

Endings tend to be much more memorable than the rest of the experience. You rarely remember experiences as an average of how you felt throughout it, rather you’re more likely to remember an experience based on key moments and/or the ending.

Therefore, endings can significantly impact how you felt about an experience or situation. If the overall experience was either bad or just not great, a good ending can change your memory of the experience to be much more favourable. It’s not just good endings, but poignant or memorable endings can also override a negative feeling from an experience.

Even if the experience is longer and more painful, you’re more likely to judge the experience by the ending. See my post on the book The Power of Moments by Dan and Chip Heath, that talked about an experiment where people showed this bias when having to keep their hand in cold water.

Generally, how the ending makes you feel is how you will judge the rest of that experience. Whether it was a day, a vacation, an employment, or a conversation, the ending can have a huge impact on your memory and feeling of the experience, whether or not you consider it to be a fair judgement.

But you can use this to your advantage! Whenever you are planning something, be mindful of the ending and find ways to make it more memorable or enjoyable.

A tip for a better work day!

Here’s a tip to having better work days. At the end your workday, take a few minutes to reflect on what you did, make a note of what you’ve accomplished and how it went, and maybe even send a short thank you message/email to someone. Taking a moment to reflect on the positive aspects of the day and your accomplishments (small or large), will help to end your day in a positive way and can leave you feeling better about your entire day.

When can be just as important as what

When you do things can be just as powerful as what you choose to do. Which means you should always take into consideration the timing of your schedule, such as big decisions (made by you or someone else), life changes, etc.

There are certain times of the day when we are more likely to pick the easier option, whether or not it’s the right decision. We tend to default to the easiest option. One of the examples in the book was judges deciding if a prisoner should be released on bail, and the study showed that judges were consistently less likely to release prisoners on bail if they were making the decision right before lunch or a break (taking into consideration all other factors).

Another example was talking about when we should, or rather shouldn’t, go to the hospital. Apparently the worst time to go to a hospital is in the afternoon, because that’s when they tend to make the most mistakes. The afternoon is usually at the end of a very long shift, meaning the doctors or nurses have been working long hours and are more likely to make a mistake.

In the book, Daniel also talks about sleep chronotypes, which identify if you’re a morning or evening person, or somewhere in between. Understanding which chronotype you have, will highlight when you will have peak energy levels and help you to plan your activities throughout the day. Some parts of the day are best for deep work, whereas others are better for the less intensive work, but these times differ based on your chronotype.

There are so many interesting details in the book on knowing when to do big life changes, decisions, or even daily routines. In the end, timing is a science, and there’s a lot of information on how to use that timing for the best outcome.

Breaks are important

Taking breaks can make you even more productive. Breaks are important on a daily basis, throughout the workday, and also over longer time frames. A break can help you reset and give you fresh perspective, not to mention help improve your energy levels. All of this allows you to return to your work refreshed.

During the day, it’s important to give yourself a break from focused work. It’s great to have dedicated time for focused work, but don’t forget to break it up with time away from your work. It’s always better if the break also includes movement by stretching, walking around, etc. or other people such as making it social (think water cooler talks).

In the theme of breaks, one of the types that Daniel advocates for are naps. Naps can provide so many benefits, and leaving you feeling so fresh. Just make sure that the naps are not too long, around 20 min or less is ideal. There are also a handful of locations around the world that have naps (siesta and others) built into their culture.

Ideally, you should integrate breaks into your daily routine and long term thinking. Make sure to be strategic and deliberate, by picking the time that works best for you and scheduling your break (otherwise you might not take them).

Final thoughts

This was a really interesting book, with so many useful details. I want to re-read it as I realized I don’t remember all of the details.

There’s so much that affects how we feel and we don’t even realize it. The more we understand the science of timing, the better we can use it to get the best outcomes and have great days.

I like this because it wasn’t another productivity book about how to do THE MOST amount of work in a day. That wasn’t the purpose at all. It was about understanding how to schedule your days (and life) to get the best results. It wasn’t about working more, it was about finding what works best for you and understanding why it works for us.

References

Here are some useful links:

  • You can buy the book on Amazon here.
  • You can find more information on the book on Goodreads here.
  • You can find information from the author here.
  • Here’s the author’s website here: https://www.danpink.com/
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How to be more proactive in life and business

Have you ever wondered how important it is to be proactive? As I was reading Upstream by Dan Heath, he discusses the benefits of being proactive and how best to identify and address hidden problems in a complex system.

Photo by Marc Zimmer | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

  1. Aim to prevent, not react
  2. Think in systems
  3. Make it personal

Aim to prevent, not react

Ideally, we need to do more than just react to problems. The goal should be to try and prevent problems from happening in the first place. Dan describes this as going “upstream,” from the quote by Bishop Desmond Tutu.

There comes a point where we need to stop just pulling people out of the river. We need to go upstream and find out why they’re falling in.

-Bishop Desmond Tutu

A good way to start with this is to notice what problems seem to be common, either with your customers, community, or just in your life. Once you’ve found the common problem, you need to figure out what’s going wrong to reduce occurrences.

For example, at Expedia, they wanted to reduce the number of customer service calls, so they took the time to look at what the common issues were. They noticed that a huge percentage of the calls were about the customer’s itinerary. So they put systems in place to help people access their itinerary, such as an automated option to resend their itinerary instead of talking to a service agent. Once they made it easier for people to access their itinerary, they noticed a huge drop in service calls.

Often times systems reinforce the issues as they are not a specific person or department’s problem. For instance, the customer service calls at Expedia were being dealt with properly – promptly and satisfactorily – so there seemed to be no need to change the current system. If anything they were showing that customer service was performing exceptionally, as they were addressing so many customer issues smoothly.

Sometimes it takes a shift in perspective to identify widespread problems, as they may seem normal.

Think in systems

In connection with the point above, often to be proactive you need to think in systems not just linear reactive pathways. System thinking is important for both identifying and addressing upstream issues. This section will talk more about how to address issues within a system.

Consider everyone

A key part of working within a system is identifying everyone involved or connected to the problem and engage them in finding a solution.

One way to do find all relevant people is to think of an individual experiencing the problem (ideally someone you actually know) and look at everyone they could interact with.

An example discussed in the book was dealing with domestic violence within a community. It discusses how someone handling a domestic violence case noticed that the woman had a cast on her arm, and the break didn’t match the story given in the medical record. That cast meant that the woman had actually sought medical help and no one noticed the warning signs.

When looking to make upstream changes to prevent domestic violence, they made sure to involve people from all aspects of society to increase the number of people who could notice the signs and be able to help.

For instance, they developed a risk assessment checklist for nurses and health care workers to see if a patient is at risk of violence from someone in their life. They also noticed that people who were being released on the condition of wearing an ankle monitor might not receive the monitor until a few days after release, giving them an opportunity to be in contact with and possibly attack someone. So they made sure that they received the ankle monitor directly upon their release. Also, if there is a household with a history of domestic violence calls, they had police drive by on a regular basis to make sure everything is okay.

The goal was to find as many ways to improve the system so that people didn’t fall through the cracks and to increase opportunities for people to notice the warning signs.

Complexity

Systems are complex, which means it can be difficult to predict how systems will react to changes. It also means that you may not see direct results from your changes.

For instance, if you have a police officer stand at a corner, it may cause people to drive more cautiously and might prevent accidents. But it’s very difficult to track or identify what has been prevented.

Since it’s near impossible to track what has been prevented, its also far less common to encourage preventative behaviour. It’s much harder to show results from having a police officer act as a visual warning to increase safety than another police officer giving out traffic tickets. It’s easier to track, record, and reward individuals based on number of tickets (reactionary) given out than possible preventative behaviour.

As it’s difficult to predict how a system will react to changes, you need to have a way to track feedback. The feedback will help identify if changes are improving the system or if you need to adjust your approach. Looking for feedback requires you to actively be looking for changes and be committed to continually improving the system.

An example of this would be to track the domestic violence rates within a community, or maybe within a school looking at graduation rates. It may take years to see an impact within these clear quantitative (numerical) indicators, so it’s also useful to see if there are also qualitative (descriptive) indicators that you can track.

Make it personal

The more you can connect the problem to a specific person, the easier it will be to start identifying solutions. So if you start thinking about how we can help Ariana, then you’re able to focus on improving that individual’s situation.

By narrowing in on specific people, you’re able to get more context and delve into the nitty-gritty of how interconnected the system is. It also gives you a clear example of how an individual is affected and an easy way to see progress firsthand.

Overall, when you make it personal, it also makes it more concrete and actionable. Then you can take all that you learn from an individual’s situation to start helping other people with the same problem.

One of the examples in the book was when teachers in the Chicago Public School system wanted to improve graduation rates. They noticed a good indication of how many students will graduate was how well those students do in freshman year, so the school and teachers all started focusing on the students in grade 9 (freshman year). They changed the system by putting the best teachers in grade 9 classes, and making sure that teachers were meeting with others that shared the same students rather than the same subjects (i.e., all of Ariana’s teachers would meet, rather than all of the English teachers). This way the teachers could all work together to identify ways to help each individual, like Ariana. It ended up being hugely successful, and after a few years, they had saw the graduation rate increase and stay at that level.

Final thoughts

I like how this reframed the concept of being proactive in a way that was very tangible. There were so many clear examples of how this worked and the immense benefits that come from identifying how to go upstream and remove the issue before it happens.

I don’t think the concept of “be proactive” is novel to any of us. But this went so much deeper and discussed how it can be useful for both individuals and businesses.

It was interesting how much it highlighted the complexity, and the importance of getting everyone involved. I think that’s a point that’s often overlooked when discussing the importance of being proactive.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

References

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The value of diverse personality types

Have you ever wondered about the diversity of personality types? In Susan Cain’s book Quiet, she discusses the power of being an introvert, and how we need to embrace all personality types. She highlights the strengths of introverts, but also emphasizes the importance of being yourself and focusing on your own personal growth and self improvement.

Photo by Alexander Grey | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

  1. It’s a spectrum.
  2. Part nature, part nurture.
  3. Power in diversity.

It’s a spectrum

This whole book is about personality types, specifically introverts and extroverts. It’s important to understand what they are and the fact that they occur along a spectrum.

Most people are some combination of the two, with one typically more dominant than the other. No one really exists at the far extremes, meaning there’s no such thing as someone who’s 100% introverted or extroverted. But there are the special ones in the middle, called ambiverts, who have a big percentage of both.

“There is no such thing as a pure introvert or extrovert. Such a person would be in the lunatic asylum.”

– Carl Jung

Your level of introversion/extroversion is based on how you react to stimulation, including social stimulation like social situations. Generally, if you feel more rejuvenated or energized by external stimulation, you’re more extroverted. Then vice versa, if you’re more tired or worn out from stimulation, you’re likely more introverted. This isn’t about whether you enjoy it or if you can handle it (for example, social skills), it’s how you feel after going through it.

A good way to think about this is thinking about how you feel after leaving a party full of people that you love. You may have had a wonderful time with friends and/or family, but how do you feel afterwards. Do you leave the party feeling energized or tired?

Part nature, part nurture

One part of this book that was really interesting was how Susan delved into the idea of nature versus nurture for personality development. Basically the conclusion is that it’s part nurture and part nature.

A scientific study that showed the nature part – meaning the part that comes from your genetics – was done by looking at how sensitive children were and then re-evaluating them many years later as an adult. The study showed that sensitive children were very commonly also sensitive adults.

There were other studies that looked at the influence of parents on their children. Such as looking at how children were affected by having both introverted or extroverted parents. The environment (the nurture part) was also shown to affect the amount of introversion/extroversion. Which makes sense, your family environment shows you what’s considered normal and encourages you to act certain ways.

So, like most things, it’s partially genetic and also partially determined by our environment. Which is not too surprising, but very interesting to hear about the studies and how the conclusions were reached.

Cultural differences

You can also kind fo see this difference in the way cultures around the world view outgoing or extroverted personalities. Western cultures tend to encourage a culture of individuality and outgoingness, whereas other cultures can have more of a community focus and may discourage disruptive personalities.

An interesting example of a clash of cultures was when international students came to the USA for university. Professors were always encouraging class participation, even when people were not contributing any value. But for some of the international students they felt it was rude to speak up if they didn’t have something concrete to contribute and were surprised at how patient the professors were. Some even felt that it was disrespectful of the other students to waste people’s time when they could be learning things of value from the professor.

Susan thought it was important to discuss how culture can also impact personality types (nurture). I also really appreciated that the book had a disclaimer that general cultural trends are not absolute, and that there’s lots of individuality within every culture and country.

Power in diversity

Just like every other type of diversity, there’s power in our differences, including our personality types. We can learn and balance each other out. Two aspects that introverts and extroverts deal with differently are with risk and leadership.

Risk

Generally, extroverts tend to be greater risk takers, whereas introverts are more likely to be cautious. It’s not difficult to see how a balance of the two can be beneficial.

One example Susan talked about where an imbalance of leadership lead to significant damage was the 2008 financial crisis. It’s discussed that the crisis may have been partially caused by the culture of risk taking that was encouraged and enabled within the financial sector.

At that time, the people taking risks were creating profits and so more risk taking was encouraged. This led to having a certain kind of people (aka risk taking extroverts) making most of the decisions, and anyone who talked about being more cautious was removed from decision making positions.

It’s suggested that having more of a balance or diversity of personalities could’ve mitigated some of the damage.

Leadership

Leadership is typically thought to be a strength of extroverts, but in reality introverts can often outperform extroverts in leadership positions.

Introverts tend to encourage and enable proactive employees. This means they’re good at listening for good ideas and making sure they get implemented. They also tend to delegate more to those who can do it best, rather than making sure they get recognition.

Introverts tend to listen to others and make time for reflection or deep work. Both of these can be incredible strengths as leaders.

Extroverts can also be good leaders, and not all introverts are great leaders. This is only to highlight that leaders can come in all shapes, sizes, and personality types. Also, to show that things typically seen as being negative (being quiet) can be monumental strengths (listening).

Final thoughts

I found this book really interesting. Personally, as an introvert that sometimes crosses into the ambivert territory, I really enjoyed hearing all the scientific studies that challenge our thinking about personality types.

It was great to get a different perspective than what I grew up with, aka the idea that you need to be outgoing to be successful. I loved hearing about the benefits of introverts and personality diversity, and how we all have out personal strengths and value to contribute. This book was a delightful reminder that you just need to be yourself and that there’s no one way to do anything.

Like most things, the key is to find balance by encouraging everyone to be themselves and understand that you are enough just as you are. You don’t need to mask or pretend to be different than who you are. We, as a society, need different personality types to continue thriving, and encouraging diversity can also create positive side effects of becoming more accepting.

I know the book is not new, and people have become more accepting of introverts in the past 10 years. But there’s still so much that isn’t common knowledge, with lots of scientific proof to back it up. I would highly recommend this book.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

References

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How to kick start your project

Have you ever wondered how to maintain your motivation for a project? I was reading Kick Start Your Success by Romanus Wolter, and he describes ways to both kick start your projects, maintain your motivation, and achieve your goals. He discusses the intent behind your work and how to inspire others to engage with your project. Your project can be any kind of goal you’re working towards, whether business, personal or anything else.

Photo by Etienne Girardet | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

  1. Intent: Internal vs external
  2. Inspire others to help you
  3. Question of the day

Intent: Internal vs external

One of the first things Romanus defines is the idea of internal and external intent.

Internal intent is your personal purpose for this project. It’s the reason why you want to accomplish this goal or be successful. It also highlights the benefits you are hoping to achieve through this. Basically, what’s in this for you?

Whereas, your external intent is the purpose of this project for other people. It outlines how this will benefit and help others, along with why they should be interested in this project. Identifying this external intent is a great way to understand how to get others involved.

One activity that Romanus takes you through in the book is to craft an instant impact message. This is a short phrase, around 10 words, that succinctly outlines how you can help others and the external benefits of your project.

Understanding both your internal and external intent will help keep you focused, by understanding why you are doing this project and how you can help others. Both intents, when brought together, can make your project sustainable by balancing the benefits for yourself and others.

Inspire others to help you

A big part of this book describes how you can involve others in your project, as nothing happens in a vacuum. Romanus uses this phrase that I really like to “inspire others to help you.” This simply means finding ways to engage others in your project and have them be part of your success.

A good place to start is noticing how you speak about yourself and your project. If you speak passionately and positively about both, people will be interested to know more. It may also help you be successful by seeing the positive side of things and focusing on what you’re achieving.

Another way to involve others is to ask them for input. Ask people for advice (see below for your question of the day), you never know who might be able to help. Don’t hesitate to talk about your project and see what others think.

Romanus even encourages you to engage with the naysayers. Rather than just taking their negativity to heart, ask them how they would solve the issue they see with your project or how they would do it differently. Sometimes they just aren’t used to being listened to and would appreciate the opportunity to give you some advice. Their advice might be useful! Whereas sometimes they’re just negative and have nothing useful to say. If the latter is the case, then there’s no reason to give them any more time.

Question of the day

In combination with the topic above, one way to inspire others to help you is through a question of the day.

The idea of this activity is to craft a question you can ask people throughout the day. The question should focus on the current hurdle or barrier you’re facing, and simply asks for advice on how to overcome it.

It’s a great way to spark conversations about your project and to crowdsource ideas to overcome issues. Getting advice from a wide range of people increases your chance of getting a good solution, as well as making more connections that might benefit your project.

Plus the question focuses on a specific actionable item that you need to address and creates an opportunity for others to help you. It can also provide your close friends and family something to focus on, especially if they want to help and don’t know how.

Another great benefit of this is that you can change the question of the day whenever you have a new hurdle. Once you’ve solved the issue, then update your question to focus on the next issue you need to solve.

Final thoughts

I found the idea of connecting your project to its external and internal purpose was a really interesting way to think about it. It’s important to both provide you and someone else benefit, or else it probably won’t be successful. If you’re not gaining something from it, you won’t be motivated to keep going, and if it isn’t benefiting anyone else, then you won’t be able to make it sustainable, especially if you need to make money.

I’ll be honest, the book did come across as misogynistic and outdated. The examples used in the book were about a man looking for a job and the woman was looking for a boyfriend to complete her life. It just seemed so dated and unnecessary to reinforce those gender stereotypes. I get the idea that they wanted to show how the activities apply to a range of goals, but they could’ve easily switch the genders.

However, there were some interesting ideas and useful activities in this book, but maybe read it with a grain of salt just to find what’s useful for you.

Final tip

Here’s a life tip, if there are books that you think might have interesting parts but don’t want to support the authors financially (or don’t want to buy the book for various reasons), check out your local library! You can also borrow ebooks and audiobooks from your library by using the Libby app connected to your library card. It’s a great way access books and I use it all the time.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

References

  • You can buy the book here.
  • You can get the Libby app here.
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Why you should get diverse career experience

Are you struggling to figure out your career?

As I was reading Range by David Epstein, he outlines how generalists tend to succeed in careers, especially in our current world. He talks about the benefits from gaining diverse experience, and the potential downside to becoming too specialized. He also highlights a handful of people who became successful because they were generalists, along with instances when generalists perform better than specialists.

You’ll get there eventually.
Photo by Thomas Dils | Accessed on Unsplashed.com

Main impacts

  1. The importance of sampling.
  2. Getting stuck in a specialization can create blinders.
  3. Find your fit.

The importance of sampling

A key part of career development is finding yourself, and you tend to find yourself through experience, not just through reflection. Reflection is important, but by itself it’s not enough. This means you need to actively try things and diversify your experience to find out what you like and what you’re good at.

Head start vs sampling

Near the beginning of the book, David talks about the difference of getting a head start versus sampling. He uses two famously successful athletes to discuss their career paths, with Tiger Woods representing the head start category and Roger Federer for the sampling.

Tiger got a head start in golf, as he started really young. Whereas Federer tried a bunch of different things before settling on tennis, which gave him a range of skills and coordination that he could then apply to tennis.

It is important to note that even though Tiger started when he was very young, he was always the one asking his dad to play golf, he was not forced to play golf.

One is not better than the other, just different, but both can achieve greatness. Typically, we hear a lot about stories like Tiger’s, where they start so young and become immensely successful. But we don’t often hear the stories of others like Federer who took a very different path. These are the kind of stories that David is highlighting in this book.

Even Vanessa and Serena Williams had immense range. They were required to try a bunch of different sports for different reasons or skills, and both were encouraged to have diverse educational backgrounds and learn multiple languages. If you want to learn more about the Williams, I thoroughly enjoyed the movie King Richard.

Reframe failure

Part of the value in sampling is knowing when to stop, and knowing when you’ve gained what you need to from an experience.

Grit is important, but more important than having grit is knowing when you need to apply it. You don’t need to commit whole heartedly to something that’s just not right for you. If you can find a balance between trying new things and fully committing to the most important ones, you’ll end up being both successful and satisfied.

It’s also important to comprehend that “failure” at something is not “failure” of yourself as a person. Choosing to move on or give up because it’s not right for you, does not make you a failure.

Failure is good. It can help get you where you need to be and provide you with experiences that may be useful later.

Try new things and don’t be afraid to move onto something new.

Getting stuck in a specialization can create blinders

This book was a combination of highlighting how diverse experiences are useful and complimenting it with examples of how becoming too specialized can also be a hindrance.

For instance, a lot of the best ideas and solutions come from outside a speciality. Usually this is because the individual can bring a different perspective and apply useful lessons from other areas. They aren’t limited by the natural constraints taught by that profession/speciality, or mentality of “that’s just how we do it.”

There’s a program where NASA crowd sources solutions in exchange for a reward. Often times the solutions come from people outside the industry, as they can apply new ideas or different perspectives to the problem. Sometimes the ideas are so simple, there’s an example of one that was only a few pages long, and all it needs was a different perspective to understand the solution.

Interdisciplinary careers

Some of the most applicable careers or degrees are interdisciplinary, but can be the hardest to justify or implement effectively. Interdisciplinary experiences allow you to gain a range of critical thinking skills. Then having the opportunity to apply different types of critical thinking across subjects/industries can be hugely instrumental and lead to breakthroughs.

Tied to this concept is the idea that some of the most influential inventions or studies are interdisciplinary, as they end up being useful across many specialities. They may also provide opportunities for knowledge to cross-over as it opens the door to multiple areas.

Interestingly, most executives in business have a diverse backgrounds. The varied experience may give them a better understanding of how different parts of the company work, having worked in similar situations, or help them to develop creative solutions to things.

Lateral thinking

A lot of this ties into the idea of lateral thinking, which is the idea of taking one concept or bit of knowledge and applying it elsewhere. It can also be things like taking a solution that works in one industry and seeing how it can be applied in other industries.

One example is how a battle strategy can help medical students solve a problem. When students heard both the medical problem and the battle story together, they were much more likely to solve the medical problem using a way that mirrors the battle strategy.

There’s also a lot of medical inventions inspired by aspects of nature or other parts of the world. It’s a matter of simply applying one concept in a very different situation.

Find your fit

As mentioned above, you find your self through experiences, not just reflection. It can take time to find your fit and what you want to do. That’s okay. Everyone has their own timeline.

It’s important to not get frustrated with yourself. Don’t feel like you’re behind, or like you’re supposed to be at a specific point by this age. You don’t need to start young to be successful.

I’ve heard this before, but I really like the reminder that you only need to compare yourself to yourself. You only need to be concerned with who you were before and who you want to be. In general, you need to find the best ways to continue growing and become the most un-encumbered self. Your experience doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s.

Remember, it’s fine for you to take time determining what works best for you. The experiences you have along the journey can only serve to help you in the long run, and you never know how something might end up being useful elsewhere. No experience is a waste, and all are ultimately helpful.

One example I thought was really interesting was about van Gogh. He tried so many things before turning to art, from being a teacher to a pastor. In each experience he was fully dedicated to whichever career path he was currently pursuing, even though he kept failing. Then much later he finally turned to art, and even then it took him time to find the best fit. First, he tried drawing and he knew he was close to a good fit, but was constantly told he was not good enough. Eventually he tried painting and he knew it was a perfect fit, so much so that he developed his own way of painting. Incredibly, most of his art are from the last two years of his life.

Final thoughts

I felt like this book was really hopeful. Less people are sticking with one career path these days. It seems like people are taking longer routes to the career they want, or change careers one or more times. This book just showed how much these choices can be beneficial.

It’s a great reminder that you don’t need to hide your diverse experience, or be ashamed of it. It’s actually a benefit and may even make you more desirable. You just need to understand the benefits and know how to talk about it.

Personally, my career has kind of been all over the place. Kind of like a meandering stream slowly working towards a career in an environmental field, and now I’m taking all that experience and hoping to make it useful elsewhere.

Needless to say, I found hope that this can all work out for the best and that my experiences are all valuable, no matter where I end up or stop along the way.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

References

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Ever wondered how to think differently?

Have you ever wondered how people identify trends? Nah, me neither. But I read Non Obvious by Rohit Bhargava who identifies trends and looks to understand how the world works. It was about more than just how to spot a trend, and talked about how to understand the world and think differently.

Photo by Nick Fewings | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

  1. Stay curious and wander intentionally.
  2. The poetry (and power) of language.
  3. Do deep work offline.

Stay curious and wander intentionally

A big part of this book was talking about how to find inspiration from every where. It’s important to stay curious and wander intentionally, meaning to try new things and expose yourself to new ideas.

There are so many ways to wander intentionally, all you have to do is do things differently. You can change your routine and just look around you. Get outside your bubble (or industry) and try to understand the world. As soon as you start making adjustments, you can be exposed to new perspectives and see things differently.

When you’re looking for inspiration, make sure to look across diverse sources, such as various industries for trends that may affect you or ideas that you can apply elsewhere.

The poetry (and power) of language

In this book, Rohit stressed the power of using the right language to describe trends, but it seems applicable to so many other areas of life.

He stressed the importance of using the right words to both capture the idea and catch people’s attention. When selecting words to describe a trend (or anything else) it needs to both explain what it is without being too vague or unclear, while also being catchy and noteworthy.

Rohit notices that poets are really good at this. They understand the importance of using exactly the right word, and that often less is more. Understandably so, since poetry leaves little room for extra words.

Recently, I’ve been hearing people talk about how elegant the prose is when an author starts as a poet and moves into novels or stories. There’s something to be said when you’re used to picking each word with care, and when each one has to add value.

I feel like this can be useful in any role that requires you to use words (aka everything). If you’re intentional about the words you use, then your message can be clearer and more effective.

Do deep work offline

Another piece of advice is to do your deep work offline. Find a way to capture the information you need and work on it without distractions.

Rohit’s example of this for identifying trends is to capture all kinds of stories that you think might be relevant to trends in a physical way, either in some kind of folder or printed version. Then, set aside some time to deliberately pour over the stories and analyze them, to find what is similar and start to develop trends.

Really, what’s important is to both set time aside for this and to do this work offline – away from devices or distractions. However that process looks like for you, the idea is to do deep work in a way that removes all distractions.

It’s important to take time to process the ideas you’re working through. That may mean different things for people, depending on how you think things through. Sometimes you need to take a break and come back later with a fresh perspective. You never know when inspiration might hit.

I think this is a really valuable reminder. Not everything needs to be done without distractions, but your deep, thoughtful work can really benefit from focused work. And like most things, this needs to be intentional.

Final thoughts

Even though I’m personally not interested in being able to identify trends, I found there was useful information on how to understand the world. Obviously, there were sections that I found less interesting or applicable to me. But I think what this book emphasizes is to be open to information from all places and actively seek new sources of inspiration. And I think that’s one of the most valuable lessons to learn.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

References

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Skills to be a successful entrepreneur

Have you ever wondered what skills entrepreneurs have in common? As I was reading The Creator’s Code by Amy Wilkinson, she discusses the skills she found to be shared by the 200 successful entrepreneurs she interviewed.

Also, just a content warning, this book is a bit outdated and highlights some people who are now considered either controversial or no longer successful, such as Elon Musk and Elizabeth Holmes. If reading it, take it with a grain of salt.

Photo by Ariel | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

  1. Stay agile and test your ideas.
  2. Find inspiration everywhere.
  3. Develop the essential skills.

Find inspiration everywhere

One of the really interesting parts of this book was the discussion of how these entrepreneurs come up with ideas. Amy groups the common thought processes into three types:

  • “Sunbirds: From one domain to another”
    • Sunbirds tend to look at other industries to solve a problem in their own industry, by taking something that already exists and using it somewhere new. An example of this was getting inspiration from a helicopter blade for a heart stent.
  • “Architects: building new models from the ground up”
    • Architects identify a gap or need and building something new that fits. Generally, they look for what is missing or for common pain points, then they find solutions by questioning assumptions and challenging how things are normally done. An example of this is how spanx was developed, Sara Blakely realized there was no reasonable option of what to wear under white slacks and she created something to fulfil the need.
  • “Integrators: Combining concepts”
    • Integrators tend to combine existing parts to create something new, such as putting unexpected things together like unusual spice combinations. They tend to mix and match until they find breakthroughs. An example of this is Chipotle, as the founder wanted both fast food and the best, fresh ingredients.

But overall, the key ingredient for each of these is curiosity.

Stay agile and test your ideas.

So not that you have your idea, you need to start putting it out in the world.

A key part of the initial stages is to remain agile. You need to find ways to test your ideas, ways to get started and see if that’s the best direction to go.

Being able to test parts of your strategy allow you to fail on a smaller scale, and fail wisely, before fully committing to a large investment or an overarching strategy. It also ensure that you’re not restraining yourself by going all in on aspects that you can’t change later on if fail. It’s also a great way to quickly get feedback on your ideas, allowing you to continuously improve without getting stuck.

While staying agile, it’s important to keep your overarching goal in mind, guided by the general direction you want to go. This mix of maintaining an overarching direction while testing lots of things in the shorter term, provides brand consistency and resilience.

Develop the essential skills.

The backbone of this book is that Amy interviewed and analyzed over 200 successful entrepreneurs to find similarities between them. Based on all of her research, she created a framework that outlined what she saw as six essential skills of all the entrepreneurs.

The six essentials skills she found are:

  1. “Find the gap:” To keep their eyes open for opportunities, be curious about the world and look for new ideas.
  2. “Drive for daylight:” To stay focused on the future. Similar to a race car driver, keep your eyes on the horizon as generally you will go wherever you look.
  3. “Fly the OODA loop:” The OODA (observe, orient, decide and act) loop was developed by a pilot. It means to keep updating your assumptions, stay agile, and always be evaluating your situation/environment.
  4. “Fail wisely:” To practice and master small failures so that you can avoid catastrophic mistakes. Basically make small bets to test your ideas and develop resilience.
  5. “Network minds:” To bring together diverse individuals and collaborate with unlikely allies. As well as find interesting and engaging ways to connect with others (ex: gamify work, competitions, etc.)
  6. “Gift small goods:” To be generous to others, often by sharing information and offering kindness. This strengthens the relationships in your network and helps build a positive reputation.

Final Thoughts

I thought this book was okay. There were definitely some interesting concepts. I think it’s refreshing that this book on entrepreneurs was based on research rather than just someone’s subjective perception of their own success.

But there were definitely some dated examples (like Elizabeth Holmes) that you have to read with an updated perspective. I also can’t help thinking about how personal environments are likely to have a huge influence on an individual’s success but that it wasn’t considered in this framework.

I wasn’t overly impressed with the book. But I really did enjoy the discussion on how new ideas are created and inspiration is all around us.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

References

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How a moment can change your life

Have you ever wondered how some people are able to maintain discipline for longterm change but others lose motivation quickly?

As I was reading the Holy Sh!t Moment by James Fell, he discusses how a eureka or “holy sh!t” moments can prompt long-term and sustainable change. He also discusses how we can prepare ourselves for these types of moments and why they work so well.

A eureka moment can change your identity and create long lasting change.
Photo by Justin Leibow | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

  1. Eureka moments are emotional and provide a shift in priorities, passion, or identity.
  2. Identity shifts are essential.
  3. There are always cascading effects in other areas.

Eureka moments are emotional

Eureka or holy sh!t moments, are usually quite emotional, and the emotional aspect helps create a shift in priorities, passion, or identity. For example, finding out that you’re pregnant or will become a parent can cause huge shifts in priorities as a result of this new identity (parent). There are lots of examples of pregnant women quitting drugs/alcohol/smoking once they find out they’re pregnant, and they’re able to successfully quit as this new identity becomes their new focus/priority and they’re constantly reminded of it.

You can help prep for a eureka moment by laying the ground work and being open to it, but generally the moment has to happen naturally.

Here are some ways you can start prepping for a eureka moment:

  • Be open to new ideas or experiences.
  • Think about what you want to change and why.
  • Start questioning your motivations.
  • When you’re stuck, go distract yourself and do something totally different until you know what you need to do next.
    • Ideas for ways to distract yourself are to go for a walk, exercise, cook, or do something creative. Basically you want to walk away from it until you’re ready to continue working on it. Creating that space gives you time to come back with a fresh perspective or new ideas.

As this is an emotional event, it can come from a place of discomfort. If you’re currently unhappy with your situation, this can be a good time to start prepping for a eureka moment.

Identify shifts are essential

Ideally, you want to focus on the type of person that you want to become. Focusing on being the kind of person who is healthy and thankful for what their body can do is much more powerful than focusing on how much weight you want to lose. Focus on being the person who perfects a specific sport, not on getting to a specific size or weight.

Most importantly, shame doesn’t work and often times shame can actually make things worse. So don’t keep making yourself feel bad, rather focus on the kind of person you want to be. As you develop your new identity, you’ll gradually change your exterior (or skills) too.

If you change your identity, your habits will also change. If you view yourself as someone who is healthy and takes care of themselves, then you’ll find that you gradually start making healthier choices and habits. Identify who you want to be and start asking how each decision aligns with that identity.

Another important tip is to not let yourself daydream about what life will be like when you reach your goal. Studies have shown that if you daydream about the end result, you almost feel like you’ve accomplished the goal and you often lose motivation to work towards it. Daydreaming about end results don’t get you where you need to be, rather it’s better to dream about the process and how much you’ll enjoy the journey.

Cascading effects

Positive habits in one area often spill into other areas of your life. This can be for two common reasons:

  1. A result of the focus: If you’re focused on getting really good at a sport, you often end up eating better and consuming less alcohol, drugs, and junk food with the specific aim to help you achieve your goal. Maybe you noticed certain foods make it more difficult to train or recover after training, so you end up eating it less to improve your training. Even if you’re not specifically looking to change your eating habits, your key goal is both influenced by and influences other aspects of your life.
  2. A result of how you feel: Often times becoming successful in one area can make you feel happier and more confident. That feeling can help you be successful in other areas. This confidence can spill over into areas like your career or relationships, helping you to feel and do better in those areas too.

As you focus on improving yourself in one way or building expertise in one area, you often affect other areas of your life. It makes sense, each aspect of your life is both connected to every other aspect of your life and to everything else around you.

I believe this can also happen in the reverse too. If you’re in a funk mentally or hating some aspect of your life, that negativity can spill into other areas. It can make you less motivated to take care of yourself or less motivated to achieve your goals.

I believe everything is connected, so it make sense how there can be so many cascading effects.

Final thoughts

I found this book really interesting. It was quite different than the typical self improvement book that just focuses on doing the work. It really highlighted how a huge mental and emotional shift can spark and sustain change. Sure you still need to do the work and be consistent in pursuing your goals, but this was an interesting complement to the typical improvement tips.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

References

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How to make the most of an hour

Do you feel like you never have enough time?

As I was reading The Power of an Hour by David Lakhani, he talks about how it’s not always a lack of time that’s the problem, but rather a lack of dedicated/focused time. The book discusses how setting aside one hour a week can enable monumental change.

This was similar to The 4% Fix (see blog post here), but written more for someone in business. It discussed both how one hour can create significant change, and then goes on to discuss in great detail things you can do within that hour.

Don’t miss out on the time you have, use the time you have more effectively.
Image by Murray Campbell | Accessed on Unsplash.com

Main impacts

  1. You need more focused time, not just more time.
  2. Plan your time! Outline exactly what you need to do within that hour.
  3. Outline what success looks like to you.

You need more focused time, not just more time.

A key message I got from this book was that despite everyone saying we’re too busy or have no time, we don’t need more time. What we really need is more focused time, meaning we need to be intentional with our time. Focused time is where you set aside a certain amount of time (suggestion from David is 1 hour), and you remove all distractions to focus on a specific activity/goal.

One hour can be powerful, or it can be filled with distractions causing you to not accomplish anything. You also have to deliberately remove ALL distractions. Put your phone away, turn off all notifications, close your email program, tell no one to contact you, etc. Just a friendly reminder that nothing is too urgent that it can’t wait 45 min.

David suggests that the first time you do this, it should be a full 60 min focused on outlining what you want to change/fix/improve in your life or business. Then going forward he suggests breaking the hour into 45 + 15 minutes, with the first 45 minutes completely focused on the activity and then use the remaining 15 min to do any admin type work or complete an initial first step/action towards your goal. For instance, if you’re working to improve your health, the first 45 min might be focused on coming up with a weekly workout plan and then the last 15 min could be scheduling a workout class or contacting a personal trainer. That way you can remove all distractions (including phones/internet) until the last 15 min, improving your focus in the first 45 min.

This focused hour can spark change and gives you the time to outline a clear strategy to achieve your goals.

Plan your time!

To make the most of this hour, it’s incredibly important to plan your time! This is quite similar advice to what was outlined in The 4% Fix (see blog post here). Be very intentional about how you spend this time and clearly outline what you want to accomplish in that hour, so that when you sit down to work you can jump right in.

Here are some really useful questions he outlined to help you plan your time:

  • What do I want to accomplish in this hour? (Be specific!)
  • What specifically am I going to do? (Plan the details!)
  • Who else needs to be involved in this hour and what other resources do I need? (Come prepared!)
  • How will success be defined? (Define the end goal!)

He suggests doing some of these actions during the hour:

  • Write down all the steps for what you need to do to achieve your goal (What?/How?)
  • Add deadlines for each step (When?)
  • Outline who needs to be involved at each stage (Who?)
  • Allocated time in your schedule (and others) to accomplish all of this (How?/When?)
  • What action can you do right now? – Use your remaining 15 min for this. (Take action!)

Personally, I would add one more action to the list above, that would be to outline your why for the goal. Why are you doing this and why do you want to accomplish this? Having a clearly defined why can help maintain a sense of motivation throughout the journey.

Outline what success looks like to you.

I think this was one of the more powerful ideas in this book. He states that the key to any goal or target setting is to clearly outline what success will look like. That means, at what point do you feel like you’ve accomplished your goal?

The power of outlining success is that when you actually accomplish it, you get a huge feeling of accomplishment. Often times we work on vague goals (get better at this language/skill), and it becomes something you can always work on but never really accomplish. These vague goals remove any sense of accomplishment or success, so it feels like you’re never really getting anywhere. BUT if you outline key goals or accomplishments, you can see progress being made and it makes you feel more productive.

I know I’m often guilty of these vague goals, such as writing down “improve my Thai skills” every year, which feels repetitive and doesn’t give me a clear goal to work towards. You can always get better, so when have you really achieved “success”?

This is something I’m going to be much more intentional about when setting goals. I know this is why people always talk about using S.M.A.R.T. (specific, measurable, actionable, realistic, and time-bound) goals, but I’m not always good at setting those kind of goals and they can feel too constraining or cumbersome to create. But thinking about what success means, is a much easier way to frame it. It also gives me key milestones to celebrate, making it a bit more manageable and rewarding.

Final thoughts

There were a handful of good concepts and ideas from this book that helped complement the ideas discussed in The 4% Fix. I feel like it helped me appreciate the value of getting different perspectives on the same thing. The two books were both discussing a very similar concept, but were very different in their approach.

I feel like if you’re not in business, then there’s quite a bit of this book that won’t apply to you. But if you either have your own business or are involved in the business/management world, there might be some really useful ideas in this book. To be fair, it’s also setup in a what where you can easily just read the sections that are relevant to your life.

Have you read this book? I’d love to hear your thoughts in a comment below!

References

  • The book can be bought here.
  • You can find out more about the book here at Goodreads.
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